In these Radiowaves-exclusive articles, legendary presenter Pat Courtenay shares his views, ideas, experience, and tips with our visitors…

This time around Pat talks about his new job which understandably means Courtenay’s Column will be less frequent…


The way of it is, you’re welcomed among your own, let’s face it!
When I “sheepishly,” [pardon the Kiwi reference!] asked could I come back, it was because I felt guilty. So many things had happened, so many promised e-mails had never materialised. To anyone affected, and to each of the lovely people who answered my “Red Face” thread, I apologise.

Because this is print, I can!

On the Radio we can never apologise because it makes us sound fallible, and the nature of our Business is perfect escapism. Therefore we must never get it wrong!

I got asked in a sweet e-mail, had I become “old and cynical, like (so many of) “the others?”


I’m having so much fun on this new Breakfast Show (# 6 in the market…but only for now…because I’m the hottest act in town!) but combining it with a sharp sense of the Commercial.

“Now can I have the job???”

I’m well-enough paid, with 4-wheel-drive and all, but the buzz is the desire to go from # 6 to # 1 and have fun!

I chose The Breeze against a much higher offer because of the people here.

I get to work with a 22-year-old genius. He aspires to Management and he and I work well at “getting things done”, in a place where nothing’s been done for ages. He reminds me of the rising Liam Thompson.
I get to work with a super-talented, all-singing, all-thinking mid-20s Maori man who shows me the chord patterns for “Wherever You Will Go” by The Calling and the suicide one by Fuel.
I’m landlocked, like the Midlands [bad for a coastal man] but I have a 7th-floor view of a Shannon-style river and the studio faces East!
My Newsreader is a young grandmother who’s now looking forward to coming to Work. [She wasn’t before.] Her joy has improved her work.
My Helper is, crudely-put, a cripple [mid-20s] who has a black belt in Aikido and takes the piss out of me…because he can!…with a black belt blah, blah, blah…

But there’s no truth to the rumour that our [23-stone] Maori Affairs Minister was stopped by Police on the weekend, or that they found pizza in his car with a street value of $21,000. (FX: TSS-BOOM)

A few weeks ago, his Parliamentary colleagues went to him and said they were worried about his weight: no matter where they sat in the Debating Chamber, they were still sitting beside him!

And so it goes on.

No. No cynicism. This amazing Business that we’re in gives us the chance to do what 99.9999 per cent of that entertainment-hungry world can’t! That’s what makes each of us great.

Thanks for the welcome back.

P.S: no, we don’t stream but, John, I’ll send you a CD.

Next: Bad Callers?

© Pirate Radio Limited & Radiowaves. First published September 1st 2003